Post AVATAR Movie High

I just saw AVATAR in 3D. I thought it was amazing. I will be the proud owner the second it comes out on DVD.

In relation: The soundtrack was phenomenal. Phenomenal. At one point in my life, I was a crazy soul with ambitions and intentions of making a career out of writing soundtracks. Film-score school and studies, living out in Hollywood, flying across the world for recording gigues and world premiers etc. I had the ear. The mind. And was honing the technical abilities.

Some days I still wonder "what if" about that life. And I never allow myself to completely shut out the notion or the possibility.

I have been given the gifts of a mind bestowed with an insatiable hunger for stories...
an ear for the sounds of the world which is the reality we live in daily as well as that which exists only in our imaginations...
and a heart that knows and believes in the awesome power and beauty that results when story and sound wrap themselves together before our eyes.

I think I would make a great film score composer...

awaiting Christmas...

Turrrrrkey

Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!! Love love love it.

:o)

A very happy me.

the way it is

Sometimes we are forced to "grow-up" fast. Sometimes the learning curve is directly upon you, and you don't have the luxury of having an opportunity to be ahead of it. Whether it be due to sheer circumstance or self infliction....

Halloween? Not a fan.

I don't like Halloween. I don't get into Halloween. Grumpy Gills? Maybe. What's the big deal about it? It seems to me, year after year, this Holiday turns into a ridiculous contest...
"who's going to have the most creative costume" ---> And How can I out-do, everyone else.

And of course there's always the standard naughty bumble bee or whatever. The Dirty Pirate Hooker. Gender-Stereotyped costumes on little kids. Someone will almost undoubtedly be dressed as "white trash." Dare I call all of these, Halloween Classic Costumes....ick. It's all bad news. They all negatively reinforce something in some-way or another.

And someone WILL in fact, have a better costume. AND someone WILL in fact be jealous, and make some low-line comments. And like always, Halloween becomes a dramatic, costume covered, night of high-wire Competition, fueled by a steady supply of cocktails, beer, and shinanigans.

Me. I'm more into the pumpkin pie. And even Jack-O'lantern carving. That's festive right? Lame.

Monday Night Dinner for Mom and Dad

Pan Seared Fillet of [Locally Caught] Brown Trout in lemon oil, butter and herbs----thanks Fisherman Bob.

Boiled Yukon Gold Potatoes with Crimini Mushrooms slow roasted in White Truffle Oil, fresh rosemary, and white onions

and a side of my favorite: Peas, Carrots, and White Onion softened in a Yellow Miso Broth.


dig it.


Two words: Very pleased.
:o) more for the recipe book....

IN SEASON

Today lindsey and i made homemade apple sauce. And Apple Crisp. *Baker's Note: Macintosh and Cortland apples = Great for baking. Slightly sweeter, more firm and meaty. Real butter. Brown sugar and your classic fall spices!


Trust me...your envy can't be big enough. :o)

Such a great Saturday morning...

Self Confidence

I'm a really good writer. I should do that more. Or blog. Or both. Wonder why I don't.

Hit the Road Jack

Okay. post, well over-due. I bought my first car last week. It's quite the experience (car searching and car buying). I love my new car. It's become a bit of an obsession, which I don't feel that embarrassed about. Freedom.

For Kitty

We are a certain "breed," a certain "type of person." We are those who operate high octane lives (admittedly sometimes by choice) and find success and sanity through our consistent routines. We are those who fill our heads with countless bits of data, information, experiences, names, knowledge, and sound-bits from the outside world, but rage our own internal battle each day, siphoning the pieces of larger mysteries. We are those who force our bodies through extreme physical submission; substituting wellness components with a double or triple espresso shot, a bowl of peas, and cheese slices "en route" instead of the cancellation and re-scheduling we should probably consider. *And we find pleasure in following it up with 2 and a half hours of excessive running, diving, jumping, and yelling all on account of a plastic disc. It is this beautiful canvas of complex and diverse energy that represents us.

Loss has brought sad days. And undoubtedly difficult transitions in your life.

may you continue to walk and breathe effort into the beautiful life you've created
may you laugh with delight at life's hilarious subtleties
may you do your Goofy Happy dance with disregard for where you are or who's around you
may you explore the world with the curiosity of the kitty we miss so much
may you heed the lessons that I've learned from you;

-surround yourself with love
-remember that you are blessed beyond belief
-You are there for me, and I am here for you

- you're never too far behind your opponent for the layout-bid, so never give up on the play...

thinking of you.

A month later, Bridging Korean Camps

It's been a month since my last post.

Presently I don't have the time to fill that sort of an absence in this (one) sitting, but I simply can not stay away any longer. Camp Choson was absolutely incredible. This was a summer of Choson in which my first "batch" of campers were now the eldest. And I was humbled by their growth, their leadership, and the spirit within each of them. It was bittersweet and yet affirming, to know and witness how much my continued involvement with that camp had meant to their lives; and very sad to know that they were at a point where they wouldn't be back in camper form---but hopefully still connected perhaps even in the role of Day Camp Counselors. It made me feel old, it made me feel valued, and my heart felt so FULL. I don't like to admit it, but I know I need those people. I live my life in a semi-ignorant mode, telling myself "I'm fine without those people"; out of my own fear that someday, my life will move me away from them, whether it's career related or otherwise. So I try to pretend that I can live away from them; when I really know that inside I'm an internal wreck everyday that we're apart. Those kids, are some of the brightest most resilient humans I know. Their stories are shocking, and it frustrates me that they're forced to "grow up" so fast--- robbed of their "youth" and forced to deal with adult problems at the age of 14. And they just keep showing up. Living their lives. They're my role models. I learn from them. It's why our relationship is so special. We learn from one another...and we know.

And here I am, blogging from Korean Adoption Means Pride [KAMP] back in Iowa. I was reluctant and nervous to come back to KAMP, the result of finding ourselves in a transitioning phase, staff is beginning to thin out, a new Board, and working with a new Co-Coordinator this year---but not really working with her. Add in some very headstrong staff members, and some very "reliable-but-unreliable" ones, and a shortage in Intern Counselor Applications left my stomach in knots. ***which is funny, since I didn't even know who was on staff until about a month ago---that's right, My staff was Chosen FOR ME....their applications were NOT sent to me.... Awesome. Rant over. Anwyways-- if my Choson campers can keep showing up in spite of the shit they live through, then I should be able to do the same. After all, KAMP must go on. And we have 106 KAMPers this year!!!! Which makes my heart soar. Seriously. Forget the fact that this is a family camp so moms, dads, brothers and sisters are all around all the time, which inflicts a lot of difficulties, forget that the entire site is run down-poorly-managed and in need of a HUGE renovation, forget that my staff is underpaid and generally over-worked.....we show up because we need this, and the KAMPers do too. We show up for them. The number of KAMPers this year makes me reminiscent of MY childhood at this camp. When the numbers were consistently in the 100s year after year, and the Staff was made of ALL-STARS!!!! The numbers this year, though 74 of the 100-some are K-6, make me hope and think that with the right leadership, KAMP can rebound in the next 3 years. It's a possibility. An attainable possibility.

My life has moved very fast the past couple weeks. A promotion. A salary. A reason to stick around for awhile longer---and make/save more money just a bit longer before setting out on an adventure for myself. The welcoming I have gotten from staff, from parents, from kids, from the Board, has been so affirming of my abilities here. I often feel unqualified for the position, phony even. But I've always been my biggest critic. At the start of this week, I thought this would be my last year working for KAMP, at least for an indefinite amount of time. I have been coming to this camp for 17 years. I've been on staff for 8 years now, and Co-Coordinating/Directing this camp for 4 years now. And now I know I just can't leave this year. There's no one here to head this staff....but me. And this staff is dwindling which leaves me scared for the future; so recruiting will be a huge part of the success of the next years. I have a drive within right now---and I just can not leave "home" without knowing that my KAMPers are in good hands. Without being certain that they'll have this place as I always did. So I'm choosing to stay. I'm choosing to Show Up. I'm choosing to return. To make this place better. To fix up the crap. Sometimes things don't change on their own, and sometimes no-one else is either A) willing to or B) present to create change----as a very wise man once said, "YOU must BE the Change you want to see in the world." This is MY KAMP. This is MY HOME. These are MY FAMILY members. And they deserve better. I believe that they can have better.

So blogger. Keep your chin up. And your mind open. And your heart always ready for more. And I'll do the same. I'll make room in my busy busy life, for all of you, KAMP. Because you fearlessly show me how much this means to you. More to come soon...

Choson Reflections....seeping into my life.

Big thoughts coming... wait.

Death Life Time

It has been a very long day.
Last night someone died in an alleged explosion and fire in an upstairs apartment 2 businesses down the street, literally 10 yards, from the front door of the restaurant I work at.

Sadly, we were closed today due to smoke damage throughout the whole restaurant.... After the professional cleaners came in and sprayed the bajeezez out of the carpet, upholstery and booths with some funky "smoke and odor neutralizer" i spent today cleaning every single glass object in the bar. Stemware, glasses, bottles, mirrors, picture frames, windows, stools.... just an awful mess.

Luckily most of the food in the coolers and freezers were covered and in sealed containers....but every plate, pot, pan, tong, ladle and piece of silverware was washed and dried. Just a mess.

It's alarming to me, that foul play is perhaps aloof. Only time will tell. I was thinking quietly to myself over a few beers with other staff members this evening, how resilient this community is. Decorah has faced it's fair share of tragedies and hardships in the past year. And thinking back, I find some relief in remembering that tragedy, while awful, has a way of bringing out the very best of us. We were not created for destruction. Days like to today urge me to believe that we were brought to this earth and this world, that we've evolved to this point in history, with the inherent ability to nurture, to love, and to live with compassion and integrity of unfathomable potential.

feeling unprepared for the upcoming week of being a counselor at a Korean Adoption teen camp in Wisconsin. Haven't had time to collect my thoughts, or feelings, or pack a bag yet....which means I'll undoubtedly forget something(s) since I have to be on site in a little under 7 hours, with a 3 hour drive waiting . eff. what a day. prayers for whatever makes sense.

Time, Growth, Belief

I don't think anyone in this world can escape their past. (escape, as in "be separate from" "free" "untied"----how many more synonyms must I list in order for the vast metaphoric gray area to shrink?!?!?)

Whether the past is exhilerating, horrific, euphoric, nurtured, broken, unknown or otherwise.... It is always connected to us. Yes I said it, unknown. I'm not fully convinced that even "the unknown" is something we can escape.

We can cope. Ignore. Harness. Bury. Accept and co-exist with our past, but we can not fully "move on" from it.


Choson gives me the capacity to think aloud. And publish thoughts from days...months past.

Sometimes escape is the only solution we can humanly conclude; running, departing... Sometimes the void and space are the catalysts for clarity, understanding, and comprehension. Sometimes we need isolation.

A Rarity!!!!

Rarely do I have the luxury and good fortune of a Free Monday. But here I am, Free of work.

Thusly, I've indulged in an hour of FLN (Fine Living Network---frickin' love it). I think Mark McEwan is a god. I would love to sweat in one of his kitchens.... anyways, he has a show on FLN, The HEAT, and it's captivating television. Truly. See it and believe it.


Absence from blogger has been due to the gorgeous weather and the greening of golf courses in the area.... I have no apologies. Somehow I've become a decent golfer...weird. I like it.

The restaurant has been jam packed---graduation weekends---and the summer schedule is looking great, weddings, rehearsals, events/private parties filling up the few weekends of the summer. I've been left to more or less manage the restaurant the past couple weekends while the bosses have been out of town at showers, wine tastings, Mother's Day Vacation to Napa..etc. [What a life; don't get me wrong, they're married to the restaurant too...but everyone needs to get away now and again--recharge, re-center, search for new inspiration and focus. I think it's a chef thing.]

Because I've picked up, in this industry, something can always be better. :o) **And if it can't, you're either ignorant and lack motivation, or you're hungover and in a food coma from the most mind blowing, palate tantilizing eating experience ever.

And now I need a sandwhich.

Soup's On!!!!!

Ooooh. I'm excited. Exhausted but excited. It was a crazy crazy shift @ the restaurant cooking... 199 people---not quite as close to the 246 we served on Mother's Day, but pretty ridiculous none the less.

So what would I do with myself after a draining 9 hour shift??

Come home and cook of course :o) I am a NERD.

Anyways---last Monday I ate lunch at Quang's Vietnamese in Minneapolis with friends.... I had a spectacular bowl of Pho. It was inspirational...amazing. Mouth Watering.

So I came up with my own rendition of it this evening.... ooo baby ooo baby! :o)

Very pleased with myself .... :o)

ADIOS!

a very much deserved day of vacation.....

destination: center of the universe ....... minneapolis.

sushi sushi sushi ----- Shopping! market, adventures, AK reunion!

T minus 6 hours!

ZONK>

no more to say.....please see title.

I retract the "please"... just "see Title." WOw...



So true.

Running the front of the house for the next week... FOR REALSkis.

Chef Robert Irvine & DINNER IMPOSSIBLE

I am continually pulled back to tune into this series, because it's aggrivating and that makes it compelling. It's high stress---and for some reason those environments [while potentially hostile and flat out defeating] make entertaining TV. The great thing about this show is that the clock is always ticking DOWN. Always. Time is ALWAYS against Chef Robert. He puts together these ridiculous menus for the most obscure and atrocious numbers of eaters thinkable, in SCARY short amounts of time---with angering working conditions and inexperienced aid.

I'd like to try his food, to see if my mouth thinks it's as marketable as his show. What I would give to be a fly on the wall in his kitchens.....

His show is like--um, an encyclopedia of "Do's and Do NOT's" in the catering world. Lock it into the memory bank. Click Click.

Monday

Wild day at work:

A disheveled elderly woman meandered into JD's today, and both my boss and I greeted her and offered our assistance. She ignored us, and continued to saunter along the front wall of wine racks for what must have been 30 or 40 seconds. I had snuck past her to stock a few bottles in the far corner of the store, and came back around asking if there were anything I could help her find. I found my inquiry being ignored a second time as she walked past me back towards the front counter. A few feet from the door she stopped, looked my boss and then myself in the eyes and told us that we worked/ran "an inappropriate business to have [pause] next to such a beautiful college..." She padded two steps closer toward the front door, looked back and recanted, "...excuse me for being straight and old fashioned." And with a final defiant "humph" and a head nod, she pushed her way back outside and continued towards downtown, my boss's "...mm'okay ...thanks?.." drowned out by a car accelerating through the 4 way intersection, and our front door clicking shut.

In disbelief, mouth gaping, I looked around for an army of angels or blinking neon signs, sirens, whistles, a flock of sea gulls or something, anything absurd to truly confirm the likely-once-in-a-lifetime event that had just taken place. I laughed... we laughed. She certainly told us.

*It brings me to an interesting point for contemplation and thought however. It's 2009, and thousands of people are finding/ will find themselves trying to enter/re-enter one of the toughest job markets EVER in our countries history. Employment means so many different things to so many different people. And many jobs or positions we take for granted; we take little notice of, or lack the understanding towards the importance and significance behind.

Who is the person who drove the truck, which carried the pallets, which contained the beans, that were boxed on the conveyor, which were cleaned by the hands of the woman whose family was out in the fields, that worked beneath the sun and rain clouds....all for you to enjoy your single drip, double espresso amaretto mocha as you frantically wait in line with a dozen other suits, desperate for your caffeine fix, hoping it will subdue the gut wrenching dread of the next 6 days ahead of you. Or the individual that's responsible for the perfectly creased cloth napkin that adorned your reservation of 8 last weekend at Alinea or Vermilion . Someone is cleaning. Someone is building. Someone is assembling, or stocking, or researching, picking, pulling, driving, washing... doing the unglorified dirty work that is perhaps underpaid, over-worked, and wrongfully cheated of liveable wages or job equity.

So I could care less if I was the victim of an attempted shaming this afternoon. I know that my work mean's something; to LOTS of people here in D-town, even if it is at JD's. There is purpose behind it. Perhaps not global purpose, perhaps not life changing or life saving [I suppose it would be ignorant not to include, life-ending as well...although that is a lengthy side-street of a conversation of its own], but I think being an employee at that store is rewarding. I think my employment, and that business is a part of something positive, a piece of something worthwhile. I have never felt sorry for being "a guy who works at a liquor store." Not once. People say things like, "God, I hope I never grow up to be a _____." or "I hope I don't end up being a ______ doing _____." [Electrician...bus driver....mail man...newspaper boy...late shift gas station clerk....Big-K-Mart Manager....McDonald's employee...a recycling center can counter or a garbage/trash pick-up...a second hand store....a toll booth operator...a waitress/server...ETC.]

The woman's comment today makes me slow, not necessarily stop, but certainly slow...and think: Why are those people working in those "unglamorous" positions? What is their reasoning? What causes them to take a position like that? Lack of education? Lack of ambition? Age? Sex? Family? Tragedy? Addiction? Automatically, I'm making an assumption, that you...that we, think and list, hardships, challenges, outside interferences, uncontrollable variables...

Maybe they work there, because they "know what they do [and know what they're doing]." Maybe they work there because they're getting paid more there, than they were at their previous job. Maybe they choose that job, that business, because it's the only plausible option for them at that time.... and maybe, amidst all of the what-if's, possibly's, and perhaps' is that which turns heads and ears, defies our societal desire for heirarchal status... maybe they choose it because they're happy.

In other news: B-Man has some how finagled his way into avoiding surgery--by doctor's consent--and continuing on with his season with basic a splint/covering and basic precautions. Lucky little bugger. Praise the Lord.

Recharge

It was another busy Sunday morning at the restaurant. And thusly---after the previous post and today's work, I took a much needed nap...for 5 hours. And missed dinner.

B-man goes to see a doc of some sorts tomorrow to hopefully get a solid prognosis and analysis of his broken hand. He seemed in fairly good spirits today during the brief time I was awake this afternoon. Things happen for reasons unknown and reasons we can not comprehend. I certainly attest to that. Much of life does.

And Decorah has and is taking on a lot of water the past 36 hours...hopefully the sun comes out soon. Or basements might be getting wet "again."

sad saturday...frantically drained in every sense...

this has turned into a sad and challenging saturday... I'm reliving and re-experiencing a violent torrent of emotions I've previously wrestled with vicariously through my younger brother; who, while in a soccer match today, broke a bone [in his hand] that will require surgery, amidst his senior year of the high school soccer season--at an undefeated point in time.

I absolutely ache. Partially from the bloody-mind-and-body wrenching night behind the bar (private party of 40, reservation of 18, reservation for 10, reservation for 8 reservation for 6, restaurant completely full in between....100% Thrilling Rush--100% Exhausting--100% CRAZY!!!!) mostly from the cyclonic dizzied frenzy my mind is racing along right now. I can't help but compare and contrast my own past season and dream ending soccer injury to this of my brother's. It's horrid. I feel horrid. Words simply don't strike accord with the strain on my face at this current nearly 2 AM hour.....

Hind sight is a bitch and yet a valuable source of wisdom, experience, and opportunistic avenue for comfort and consolation...and connection. Because losing dreams; it puts oneself on an island---that is miles and miles from any sort of other human existence, and the desire for human engagement and encounter. It hurts that badly. It is THAT confusing. It is THAT powerful. And I want, SO badly, for my brother to not feel left alone on an island by himself, with only his own racing mind and messed up emotions to keep him company; because I've been in that lonely place before. And it's terrible. Just terrible. And he worked sooo hard, my parents worked sooo hard, to schedule surgeries prior to this season so he COULD play, and compete, and simply have the opportunity to make a dream become a reality.

He texted me one of the most frustrating texts I've ever received tonight while I was at work...a lot of FML's... I want to say something to him. I want to be of some comfort. But part of me thinks that individual's in that much turmoil simply can't be reached by human desire or action----solely through something of higher power, higher purpose...a far greater love than can be humanly expressed.

I have to work in 5 hours...and I just know that I won't sleep tonight. I'm in need of writing him a letter...of collecting my ownself....my own thoughts...in hopes that those words and reflections of mine, might save him some pain...might help him cope....might encourage and sustain a flicker of hope, when he feels like everything is lost. I need some Michael W. Smith. And a big note-pad...and a pen with lots of ink.

So many prayers for B-Man tonight. Many of them... I'll undoubtedly need this space, this blog, to process in the up and coming hours..and days.....because when he aches I ache. And when he's sleepless... I certainly am too.

Spring Cleaning

Good food makes you smile. Great food makes you laugh...

**It's not just what you're eating....it's who you're eating with. And why you're eating together. Some would perhaps argue that great food doesn't provide you the opportunity to laugh; it merely commandeers your brain and forces you to savor in euphoric silence and awe...

I have recipes and visions smoldering in my brain. Daily.

Lunch at the restaurant is starting to take off... which is cool...the first few weeks have been like "starting a race"---you don't sprint out of the blocks. But we're all learning (at least I think we are) a bit more each day, and making adjustments to attract more customers, work more efficiently, and maintain an equilibrium of Value and Satisfaction.

Cocktails are calling...... gotta go!

Holy Crap...aiiye...

okay. no organization. I'm fricking' wiped out...it was a crazy busy good weekend and looking back I don't even understand and fathom how many glasses of wine I poured or cocktails I made....ugh.

almost disgusting. wow... but so good.

ish..i don't know what I'm even saying. goodnight talk soon...later.

coherent.

Prom Dinner For 8

1. Baby Spinach with Lemon Vinaigrette
   
   
2. Roasted Balsamic Grape Tomato Marmalade and Mint Leaf on Crostini
   
   
3. Steamed Snow Peas and Carrots with Cilantro Butter
   
   
4. Linguine Alfredo
   
   
5. Panko Crusted Ginger Peach Marinated Chicken Breast with Roasted Sesame Oil and Maple Glaze
   
   
6. 'Apple Pockets' Puff Pastry Filled with Pink Lady Apples Simmered in Quady Red Electra and Cinnamon Sugar Reduction

Booya. :o)

such sweet words...

Mystery creates wonder and wonder is the basis of man's desire to understand. --Neil Armstrong

Cooking Competitions

I'll admit it. I watch a fair amount of Food Network and HGTV...Discovery Channel...Travel Channel... for some really lame reason I refer to this conglomeration of shows as The DC ("Domesticated Circuit").

Okay rephrase: The DC is often on TV at my house...i may not be full-heartedly watching it, but it's on....

I like to watch the cooking competitions that have become a huge fad, Top Chef, Next Food Network Star, Iron Chef (and I even cringe my way through an hour of Iron Chef America every now and then...) Ultimate Challenge, and most recently Chopped! *Don't worry, I'm still waiting for the 3rd season of Army Wives on Lifetime to air later this summer/fall.

I think I could win one of those competitions. [*In due time, I fully intend on submitting a tape/application for Top Chef...if it's still on the air in 10 years] The Celebrity Chefs that are sweeping the hearts and minds of Americans via Food Network (Emeril, Mario Batali, Bobby Flay....etc.) are who they are not simply because of their culinary abilities, but largely in part for their personalities and marketing potential. That and they have a lot of $$$.

Anyways. I've contemplated entering recipes of my own, and I have these illusions and dreams of a huge TV breakthrough by winning something. And they're nice thoughts, but I generally dismiss them, mostly l tell myself these silly things out of my personal disapproval with a contestant's tragic choices....or because I can't stand Alton Brown. And that I think Guy Fieri is a sad excuse for a cooking show host.

*I fully acknowledge the ease with which I can sit back and type ferociously, all the while verbally bashing these Culinary figures and their careers....and ignoring how little I actually know in comparison to them.

Did I mention I hate Raechel Ray?? Because I do. A lot.


So what started as a nice post about competitive aspirations has become a bloody rant against Food Networks overly praised, overly payed icons. Best post I've put together in awhile! if I do say so myself.

Lunch Nerves

First lunch shift EVER @ the Rubaiyat tomorrow......

My brain feels like a jet pushing mach 4 and my stomach is not its normal self.

Classic combination results in equation:
Jello brains + Jello Tummy = Sleepless in Decorah


(har har)
.... So I guess I'll read my newest book: Service Included: Four-Star Secrets of an Eavesdropping Waiter by Phoebe Damrosch.

Review to come shortly... Hopefully Wednesday is a lucky day. Might need it.

Hired for Prom

....planning a menu for some local Prom-go-ers in a couple weeks.

*yes.

In a nutshell

Busy bees make lots of honey...but not without flowers.

Wacky Wednesdays

I cleaned today----and amidst the wake of recycling, trash, rags, old journals, pictures, and boxes I found some $30 of loose change in a ziploc bag.

Lunch @ the Rubaiyat coming soooooooon!!!!

My brother has decided to be a Johnny in the fall.....oh my.

Wined and Dined Continued...

Okay (So THAT was FUN!)---where was I?
Happy Hour at Pescara. Pat came and met us while were we enjoying their crab cakes and Ahi Tuna tartare.... I was formally introduced to him by my Aunt, and as we shook hands he asked if I'd been shown around. I knew what was coming, and could barely hold back my eager excitement, "Nope, we've just been gawking at the bar and the interior design."

"C'mmon, I'll show you the restaurant." With that I was given a thorough 20 minute tour of the floor and kitchen. New state of the art 30 ' hood over the line, saavy space saving and storeage decisions. This past Saturday was their first full weekend. Apparently it was a mongo big night of Saturday business, but their staff looked alive and alert, and everyone paid their respects to Pat when he walked by or approached them. "Hi Pat" "Hey Pat" " [head nod], Pat" .

Watching him walk through his kitchen was impressive. He tasted the soup, he scoped out one of his cooks prepping steaks, he hand pressed the dinner rolls waiting to go into the oven, and everytime he was greeted by an employee, I was introduced and paid the same formalities. It was a prime example of "The Hierarchy." ----> "A friend of the owner's is a friend of mine" mentality....."A guest of Pat's is a guest of mine." I felt like royalty. It was a real solid kitchen, and reminded me a lot of the floor plan from the kitchen at the Hotel Winneshiek where I formerly cooked. The walk-in coolers, prep areas, office space, everything...it was a great tour. Fine dining, fresh seafood was their pitch, and I can only hope they continue to deliver as well as they did during our time spent at Pescara.

The night was young. Somewhere between 5:15 and 5:30 we finished jabbering over how great the crab cakes and tuna tartare was and Pat led us over to Chester's Kitchen and Bar. The location didn't matter---all staff members looked him in the eye and addressed him by name, no matter what they were presently doing (Hosting, bartending, cooking, prepping, waiting, serving, cleaning, etc.). Pat ordered up a couple of their signature martini's, a fresh pineapple infused vodka base. Their drink menu was curious and their wine selection formiddable, but I was immediately drawn to the fact that both places had Stella Artois on tap. (Major BROWNIE POINTS from Jackson)

Pat grabbed me and said, "C'mmon, you being a restaurant and food guy, I think you'll really appreciate this..." Off we went towards the back of the dining floor, where the open air kitchen was bustling! Signature racks of local rotisserie chickens turning over hickory wood burning roaster...the kitchen area was compact. That's the best description I can give, everything was tight, close quarters--and they moved like lightning. It was like being given a tour of a bee hive. Every one was moving, communicating in one form or another, visually/verbally, and they all knew their roles. "Like a well oiled machine." Senior staff, the best combination of kitchen employees, was working on a Sunday evening (a privilege) and they were in the ZONE. Pat showed me their walk in coolers, prepped from floor to ceiling [practically over prepped....in a space that small you can't possibly afford to even come close to "running low, let alone running out" of an item.

Let's put it this way: last year Chester's raked in about $4 Million. A staff of 100. They do business. They do good business. Lots of it. I suppose being 240 yards away from Mercy Hospital and the University of Minnesota Rochester Nursing schools has a lot to do with it....

Translation: like 35,000 people 250 yards away at any given moment. Yyyyeah. They do good business. Their service was top notch (perhaps because Pat was sitting at the table with us, either way, I don't mind being the beneficiary of such treatment.) Pat orderd us 4 appetizers to try, and an hour after that...we were so full, and Pat had to go....but we thanked him, groaned once he'd left...and ordered some of the entrees. Good Gracious. The night was just awesome. Wonderful man to meet, so warm, so personable, such an incredible grasp on the restaurant industry.... in the meantime, I'll keep getting my ducks in a row.

http://www.hazellewoodgrill.com/

http://www.joeynovas.com/

http://www.chesterskb.com/

Wined and Dined

Sunday was "full" in every sense. A busy brunch crowd had me at work from 7:30-2 p.m.

33 minutes later my parents, a friend, and myself were on the road to Rochester. I had made the conscious decision not to eat anything all day other than a piece of toast before the shift got crazy---although I took part in the kitchen staff's weekly Sunday-Red-Bull-Slam-Off (which I win every week thank you very much).

We met my aunt and uncle downtown for an early Happy hour and Appetizers at the Radisson's (soon to be a Double Tree) newly opened Pescara. Co-owned by Pat Woodring and Scott Foster. Names sound familiar? Hello Twin Cities black hole---> the guys also have opened Joey Nova's and Hazellewood Grill and Tap Room.

Pescara's drinks were solid, Sunday business was minimal and we basically had the place to ourselves. Everything was that brand, spankin' new, sparkling, clean lines....very chic, modern interior design by a New Yorker who has helped Pat with all of his restaurant endeavors. Pescara sources their menu by flying in fresh seasonal fish, as well as local and regional markets. The Ahi tuna tartare was ridiculously good....roasted sesame oil, fried wantons (for texture), soy sauce, red pepper, and avocado.... Texture was SPOT ON. So much balance, pickled ginger to cleanse the palate, wasabi on the side....who needs it. The plate itself was molded into a tower of 5 distinct layers (likely with the help of a cylindrical biscuit cutter as the mold) three layers of the tartare symmetrically split by 2 layers of diced avacado.

I'd have no complaints if I was forced to eat it every meal for the rest of my life. That good. That Fresh.
Plating--> elegant.

** more to come on my dining adventure!!!!!!---> off to a wine and cheese tasting....

A Rochester Dining Experience for the Ages

OH DEAR. IT was surreal.

My mouth's still watering, my mind still racing, and my appetite completely full....

wow. wow. wow. wow. WOW. And I'm tired...and can't even muster the energy for a post beyond this. Recollections of the night to come tomorrow...

"Good Friday"

Some days you simply can not top.

They are their own entity. Their own day in history. Truly. Awesome. A single speck against the enormous timeline of existence, but still there none the less. Still incredibly real. Unique.

So here's to you, who have had a "Good Friday!" Hopes are fulfilled, good news is spread, and tomorrow we can rejoice in our victories.


But why wait.
:o)

Such a terrifically surprising and happy Friday. Inforeseeably, unpredictably entertaining, educating, and enjoyable. New friends, great food, great occassions, and connections for life.

Wowzerz.

Some days I just wonder about the absurd encounters my life presents me with. You ever have those days, those CRAZY ODD days, where someone from like 9 years ago just waltzes back into your life; you cross paths at a coffee shop or happen across a news clip about them..or you get a postcard from....Trenton, Italy.... !?!?! Or an email out of the blue.

If you think about it too long, your brain will hurt. A lot. Which is why I sort of just smile through it [in disbelief] and enjoy these days of unforeseeable encounters and random acts of kindness.

Really though---the probability of some of these things is like.....INSANE! JUST INSANE ODDS!!!

I suppose it's time to go lay awake in the dark....completely stuck on the mind-blowing-weirdness-far-out-ness-surreal-improbable-ridiculous-ness that I find myself in every now and again....

Blogging Drought

Wow--- 2 weeks slipped by unblogged... Blogging and I are such a weird pairing.

If I don't blog for awhile, it actually feels really nice (because an absence is generally due to chaotic work & thus over-all fatigue which diverts me from the mental strain of putting up a coherent post). But then, I feel bad, guilty even, for Not blogging. It's like those first couple years of not putting out cookies and milk for Santa Claus on Christmas eve. You've developed these routines/traditions/patterns and an awareness that it's not a necessity makes their absence a big freakin' relief, but at the same time you feel like you're an idle, stagnant, being.

Okay perhaps that was a bit excessive, but the general analogy applies.

Spring is creeping up, and I can't wait. I had a date with Hot Stones last Wednesday, and it was possibly one of the best 2 hour segments of my life. My recipe book is steadily amassing.

Work has been...mmm..lucrative. And my boss at the restaurant threw out the word Salary to me the other day. And I froze. *It is tempting. And extremely frustrating.*

My desire to move, explore, travel, and continue learning has basically climbed out of my stomach, out my mouth, and now follows me around daily. But the thought of a steady income (that of which is much higher than my combined hourly Wages---which presently aren't anything to gripe about either) and Kitchen hours basically say "Promotion" to me. Meh.

Lastly, I'm not Irish. Happy St. Patrick's Day.

Hump Day

Today my family ate a blue collar dinner to die for!

Split pea soup, hard crust white bread, and a vegetable frittata (which while humble in preparation, was KILLER on flavor and taste!!!!)

Don't mess with mom's split pea soup.....recipe coming from Grandma, who got it from her mom..who got it from her grandmother....who got it from her...yeah, it's THAT good! Translation: 5 generations worth of passing down.

After talking with a Culinary School Admissions counselor for 90 minutes today, I feel super relieved in my planning and preparations for going to a culinary school. I am totally cut out for it. Denver....Denver....oh Denver. Are you ready for me??

Sharpening my knives..

P.S. As mentioned in a previous post--- enter Strawberries:

Laughs

Dane Cook. Kills me. :o)

His humor is so dam funny....just kills me. I could watch Dane Cook for hours....

Gracie hates Thunderstorms

It rained some this afternoon, odd. It thundered and lightning-ed A LOT this afternoon.

Gracie was nowhere to be found....except trembling in either the laundry room or bathroom. Poor pup.

Bookends & Beans

I was sitting at my favorite coffee shop in town this afternoon after work, ironically doing more work. In walked this young girl.... She had on a puffy winter coat, an over sized stocking cap that slid beyond her eyebrows allowing her eyes only half of their normal window of vision. Her arms kind of just floated at her sides partially extended (puffy jacket restricting gravity), and judging by the backpack I'd say she was about 3rd or 4th grade material.
She clip-clopped right up to the counter (to place her order), cocked her neck straight backward (the counter literally at her eye level), her lower jaw dropping as if she were staring at an angel, and after being greeted by the barista, boldly replied, "I'd like a caramel cappuccino with whipped cream and skim milk."

*I had to cover my mouth with both hands,and literally duck and hide behind my computer screen to stifle my urge to burst out laughing in sheer astonishment. It was such a confident request, and it was clear to me she was a "caffeine newb," yet she fronted like she'd been drinking it since she came out of the womb!

And I thought to myself, "ohhhh! SO CLOSE!...you forgot to tell her what size..." And sure enough, the barista proceded to inquire, how large or small a cappuccino she wanted. This second question forced a brief pause of uncertainty from the young girl. She reached into her left coat pocket pulled out a wad of crinkled up $1 bills. She quietly counted to herself how much she had, then looked back up at the barista and shoved her left hand back into the pocket. Recognizing that the girl needed some options to choose from [and who the hell doesn't need options when ordering the size coffee they want---> there are a million different terms in the coffee shop vocabulary associated with size of drinks] the barista suggested "a Medium," to which the girl nodded her head in approval.

"Okay, that wil be $3 please."
The young girl pulled the correct amount of bills from her pocket, got up on her tip-toes and reached above her head extending them toward the barista. A minute later, she was handed her cappuccino, and grabbing it with both hands, held it up to her nose, inhaled the warm steamy goodness within, paused, smiled to herself, and with that walked out of the store.

Priceless. Anyone could have seen how proud she was of herself. I can only imagine how long she must have rehearsed those few lines to herself while methodically trudging the sidewalks to Bookends after school had gotten out.

So "Cheers to you," Young-Caffeine-Addict-In-The-Making...Cheers.

Story Telling

After a long....very long, tiresome weekend of work---which was handsomely profitable....I plopped into the chair in my basement, curled underneath a blanket and crashed for 2 wonderful hours tonight. When I awoke, my dog was curled on top of my feet and the smell of pizza from upstairs brought me to my senses. A few minutes later I'd realized I was missing out on the Academy Awards.

Enter Subject: Story Telling.

The Academies acknowledge, celebrate, and highlight the people who bring us and share with us, in simplest form, STORIES. Whether real, historical, or fictional, the stories are what leave impressions on our memories. Granted the world of the Cinematography and film differentiates greatly from genre to genre, but even things like special effects and genre specific details are merely components to the essence of the movies; the stories. In words they are:
-- Informative
-- Imaginative
-- Educational
-- Valuable

Our outlet:
Pictures. Words. Music. Film. Theater. Food. Photography. -----> symbolism which we relate to, learn from, disagree with, advocate, protest, and ultimately an avenue by which we become connected to one another. I really think story telling is important, there are so many people, so many places and incredible real life dramas that are out there. So many voices, and minds, and talents that are covered up and hidden to us by circumstance.

The people who expose us, introduce us and provide us the knowledge, the vision, and the seeds for imagination and creativity: Artists: writers, photographers, chefs, musicians. I want my life to constantly entwine itself with these people and the subjects of their talents....stories. I hope I always have a hunger to expose more stories, to provide a voice and opportunity to those who are covered up and hidden from the public sphere, to give to the world, the incredible stories that deserve to be shared. Stories that people need to hear and know of, to gain inspiration, to gain perspective, to gain the opportunity to trust in one another, to communicate, and co-exist with one another. And for myself, food will undoubtedly be an avenue for achievement.

Chew on This:
Think about this, "How much do you know?" ---> How much of those things, those people, that knowledge involves a story? What stories have you told? What stories should we tell? Why is story telling important? What stories are told frequently, what stories are covered up, what stories are "altered" (and why does that happen, what are the causes...what motivations..), what stories are forgotten? ------> modified

"What stories do we tell frequently, what stories do we cover up, what stories do we "alter" (and why do we do that, what are our influences and motivations), what stories do we we forget/have we forgotten?"

*"hello authenticity"
Who/which people are over-acknowledged? Where are the good people? Where are their stories? Heroism. Guardians. Protectors. Believers. Risk Takers.
WHO are these people? How do we describe, define, categorize them...

Chocolate

When I was 8, my mom threw a birthday party for me. We invited all my friends and their moms over.
I was huge into Dinosaurs----like freakishly into Dinosaurs. I had a gigantic dino-covered comforter on my bed, and sheets. I collected little plastic toys, made "homes" and environments for them out of arts and crafts....I read all of the books the local public library had on them...ALL of them. I of course had a Dinosaur themed birthday cake. It was chocolate cake with a double layered chocolate and white frosting. Long story short, I had likely already eaten too much pop & chips, and the birthday cake put my little tummy over the top in embarrassing fashion....

Ever since throwing up my own birthday cake in front of all my friends [and their horrified mothers] I've always been a bit cautious toward eating chocolate. It's not an allergy, well--maybe it is--but I think it's mostly the quantity I have issues with. I'll eat it, and I can eat it...and I actually enjoy it every now and then; just in small portions.

Well February is like the pinnacle of Chocolate-month (and December is close behind). Those darn holidays, Christmas, and Valentines Day, and what not. So lately I've had chocolate on my mind. Last Saturday I made 3 dozen Chocolate Covered Strawberries to take for my co-workers at the restaurant. They were bombtastically luxurious. pictures to come shortly...

And in that vein, here are a few incredible Chocolate retailers/distributors' websites. I like to browse them and just get lost in their dreamy pictures and color schemes.... it's almost as good as eating their product. Everything from solid bars, box sets, truffles, chocolate covered fruits, and cocoa powders.... indulge:
http://www.franschocolates.com/home.php

http://www.kekau.com/

http://www.recchiuti.com/index.html

http://www.moonstruckchocolate.com/

http://www.mariebelle.com/

Sensory Memory: Memories

Taste. Smell. ----> Two of my strongest perceptions linked to my memory bank. Sound being a close third... regardless of the order:

I ate a peach the other day and had a flashback to when I was 6. I remember it was a pleasant July night. I was on our deck watching a neighborhood baseball game going on at the park down the street. Dad had grilled corn on the cob that night. I could still smell the sweet, wet husks on my hands from my job shucking the corn earlier. It melded with the gentle aroma of honey and well, what else but--PEACH-- juices just dripping down my chin and hands after 2 big bites. The sky was slowly turning from its warm amber glow to a soft plum, the lightning bugs gradually appearing in flashes amongst the tall grasses in my backyard by the gardens.

I don't recall where my mom had gotten the peaches from, but the fleshy interior was unbelievably soft, the texture like-out-of-this-world-velvet...and I can remember sitting in the big wire thatched deck chairs, my legs barely dangling over the seat, but swinging them in content--- a juicy peach, corn on the cob, and the relaxing sounds of summer under a quiet sky. Everytime I think of "The High Life" or Luxury..... or blissful indulgence, I always think of that peach. Dam it was SO good!

Shameless Confessional

I've always liked Julia Stiles. I think she's a good actor. And she's got really good cheek bones. And her eyes are...well. Perfectly spaced and shaped. And she has good skin. And hair. (Hair is an important feature)

Noteable movies:
-Bourne x Three
-Mona Lisa Smile (with Julia Roberts)
-Down to You (with Freddie Prince Jr.)
-The Prince & Me (with Luke Mably)
-10 Things I Hate About You (with Heath Ledger)
-Save The Last Dance (with Sean Patrick)

Also:
- was PUNK'd on Ashton Kutcher's MTV show
-Hosted SNL
-Awarded the Golden Popcorn at the 2001 MTV Movie Awards for "Best Kiss" with Sean Patrick in Save the Last Dance. *** Who DOESN'T remember this?!

And. Did I mention. She wants to be my Valentine this year. Sweet huh? :o)

Sunshine (continued)

I went on a 45 minute bike ride late this afternoon following work. IT WAS SUPER.
Recently I'd purchased some new clothes as a birthday gift to myself. I decided to wear one of my new bright yellow plain t-shirts. It's that awesome super soft stretchy cotton... and it's bright yellow. I saw it, I wanted it, I bought it.

Anyways: I went on my bike ride, having said a brief prayer for minimal injuries in the fear of a wipe out and the knowledge I was going to ride with reckless abondon while the sun was still out :o) !!!! Whizzing over the patches of snow, ice, and slush. Skidding through turns on the remnants of this winter's sanding. Splashing through the melted runoff and pools of muddy water. It was Fabulous. I knew my beloved new shirt would be effed up. And I wore it anyways.

I should have taken a picture afterward. Note to self for future spring-melt bike rides.

It was frickin' great.

Sunshine

48 Degrees, sunny skies, and a bit of a wind.

EVERYONE in Decorah is out today....walking. Jogging. Running. Car washing. It's really amusing...

Starting a New Week with Sweet Sweet Words

There's nothing like hearing the words, "You can do this."

Chitty Chatty .............bleh.

It sounds weird, but I like earning my paychecks. A slow night behind a bar is perhaps one of the most excruciating things ever....(well I could think of much more frustrating and painfully agonzing things, but to list them all would be overkill). "Slow" and "forgetful" were not options for a night in the restaurant industry like we had tonight....Tonight, I got slaughtered behind the bar.....it was a brutal night of work---mostly because my co-bartender wasn't moving nearly as fast as he needed to be, nor thinking nearly as quickly as he should have been based on the constant stream of new drink orders between both the restaurant and bar patrons from 6:15-9:30. My shoulders and back feel like I got hit by a truck...literally....like I was put through a cement wall. My feet are sore and my brain is like jello.....at one point tonight I kept track of 14 different, consecutive drinks (cocktails, beer, & wine). It was during this same 4 minute window in my evening that my Co-Tender went to chat with some people who were dining and drinking in the lounge.

On another night, I might not have cared---but since I'd been doing all of my work plus half of his the past 2 hours his decision to go shmooze with our customers was not seen in positive light.

On another note, the owners were out for the evening and no-where to be found at the 'Yat. Instead they were enjoying celebratory cocktails after winning Small Business of the Year awarded to them by their fellow Chamber Members. Dam. I hope my restaurant racks up the accolades like Kim and Andy have in their 1st year of business.

What's that??? Oh, sorry----my back and shoulders are screaming at me, but it's okay--my brain isn't functioning anyways....a ridiculous night bartending.

Belief

Every morning I wake up, I look at a page inside an old, old journal of mine....worn and frayed on the binding from being toted through the forests at bible camp, crammed inside of various bulging book bags, faded from many an afternoon sunbath on the library lawn......weathered by age....opened in some of the most awesome settings, privy to some of the most beautiful sunsets, mountaintops, and coastlines, filled with some of the most memorable travels, adventures, and private entries I've ever written.

The page I read says, "I Believe. I believe every new day is worth doing good. I believe every new day is worth doing good for someone else. I believe every new day is worth this belief. Wear your belief unconditionally Jackson."

Super Bowl

Two words:

SO FULL.

Aaron's white bean chicken chili: savory....velvety....
Aaron's spinach artichoke dip: Heaven...
Rachel and Michael's Crock Pot Lil' Smokies and Chicken Sausage slices: Tri-fecta!

SO FULL.

Birthday

I would never have been able to predict that I'd learn sign language, go to a sudden death overtime thriller of a hockey game, and laugh as much as I have the past couple days. It's obvious to me, the short break this weekend was "due." And now...for a brief lesson in cooking: (Jesse is in dire need of assistance mincing onions and making Super Bowl Chili).

Great weekend....not anywhere near "finished"...

Who I Am:

I dream about food.... with such frequency that sometimes I wonder if it's unhealthy, or if I should have my mind focused elsewhere (and sometimes I probably should). I dream about vegetables and produce, the progression of growing seasons, irrigation and landscaping.....the insatiable smells of standing smack dab in the middle of a 100 square foot herb garden in full bloom....

Tonight at the restaurant, I opened up the walk-in cooler and jumped up and down when i saw a box of big 'ole fresh limes. Limes.....seriously. I'm not so sure something like that should make a guy as excited as I was. I guess they were just sooooo green and bright.....I was just blown away.


Mind, body and soul, inside and out....I am a foodie. A chef [in the making]; one who feeds others....

Inescapable.

Solving a Jigsaw

Today was one of those days. Of "those days", which day was today? *That phrase is so generic...so murky and vague. It was the type of day where routine/everyday happenings and things stand out against their all too familiar backgrounds and surroundings. Where subtleties laid waiting to surprise me, and the "what if's" , "just maybe's" , and "it could happen's" craned their necks, and found their posture.

Humans. We are so funny.. and whimsical. and INTERESTING. Much of our days becomes subconscious repetition/routine and it's easy to miss the brief pause Mr. T gives between smiling and waving at me every Tuesday morning near the coffee shop. I've always noticed it....but have continually missed the significance in it until today.



Great day for the record books. A great day. Days like today are worth remembering, worth recalling tomorrow, worth talking about on the weekend. They're worth blogging about---all because of their ironically insignificant components juxtaposed to their larger whole.

Every day's a new day....

New Year's Resolutions

I think one can conduct a brief survey of friends, strangers or family and surmise: You either love 'em or hate 'em [N.Y.R's] .

In a previous post from a few weeks ago, I'd mentioned something to the effect of "Habbits are so hard to break--that's why they're habbits [for better or worse]. And N.Y.R's are often hated for being such a pain in the ass to formulate. They force us to acknowledge our undesirable personal qualities/characteristics we've either developed or exacerbated.....or both!?!?!"

In years past I've had long lists and other years my lists have ceased to exist. This year I have a list. 20 some days into 2009 and I'm pleased to say that my list is "Still in tact." A verbatim, sneek peek into some of Jackson's 2009 NYR's:

(in no particular order or priority)

-- Volunteer "ME" (mind/body/and/or soul) monthly
-- Read Everyday
-- Pray
-- Write letters
-- Dream with courage
-- Recipe portfolio
-- Create your Best KAMP ever
-- Sibling relationships
-- Inspire
-- Define necessities and accessories
-- Pursue Adventure
-- Create Memories
-- Give voice to the voiceless, the poor in spirit, Remember the Least of us....cultivate peace
-- Foster friendships

I think they're worth consideration...

Surgery Side-effects & Aftermath

What feels like long ago, I had a bit of a mishap on a soccer pitch. It resulted in some extensive O.R. time (operation room) and a 3 year recovery and physical rehabilitation process. Needless to say, I feel like somewhat of an expert [at least a well-versed, experienced individual] on the inner hospital procedures, operations, and all the "maintenance" required after being sliced, diced, sewed, stiched, and stuck with needles filled with various drugs [some HEAVENLY, others...not so much], scalpels, and surgical scissors.

* I'm impressed I could actually write all those things, down... generally, I can withstand quite a bit of physical and mental pain, but when it comes to surgery/hospital/doctor related things, I'm a big wanny. Even hearing those words, [Surgical scissors....scalpels] makes me shudder and feel queezy. buuuh.

Well---as much as I would enjoy glorifying the battle scars I still bear, and recounting their epic tales of infliction, this post is for my brother. Being born with a cleft lip and palate his surgery stories, while in quantity and Total $$/"bills paid" probably out-sum my own, are not nearly as "cool" as mine. (My own list is comprised of horrific youth dog bite incidents, massive scrapes & scabs from high speed biking wipe-outs, black eyes and absurd bruises from sports injuries, and a pair of really really broken bones) But his are every bit as real and challenging to me as my own. He got home yesterday, after a 9 hour, consecutive-procedures stint in the O.R. @ Gunderson Lutheran LaCrosse. Will leave out the gory details and simply list: jaw plates, tooth, plastic surgeon, sewing.

Watching him sit on the couch all day in his pj's, wrapped up in bandages and dressings on his nose and lip, and dosing in and out from the precription drugs he's on---it's an excrutiatingly painful reminder of how annoying and how cruddy post surgery is.

Pain aside, there are 2 factors that really compound the frustrations of Post-Op-Life.
1.) Food & Diet (and this obviously is a huge deal to a foodie like myself. Not a big deal, a HUGE deal). You can't eat stuff....you slurp it. or drink it. You have no apetite. When meals come to you in deconstructed, blended form....they're not too appealing. And in Brandon's case, it's painful as well (oral surgeries make this normally enjoyable part of one's day, NOT enjoyable.) Think open mouth wounds ----> avoid salty acidic foods. The worst part, is that while your own diet takes a divebomb to the lowest levels of canned soup, applesauce, pudding, and "mush like concoctions", everyone around you continues to enjoy things like crispy, thin crust pizza, hamburgers (the big fat, hand formed kind that sit about 4" high on the plate), and the holy grail of munchers: Chips & Salsa. *Personally, I don't like giving up cereal....but I can't stand cereal when it's soggy.....and that is how one eats cereal when they've had oral surgery; Soggy. bleh.

2.) Bed rest. Surgery is physically draining. You lose weight. Lots. (Hooray, some people think.....NO.) I predict Brandon will be 10-15 pounds lighter in about 2 months...sad. He's already a skinny little boy. I mean, he's a tough cookie...he's just lean, and shaving 10-15 lbs. makes him look......peaked. *This partially due to the previous item, Food and Diet. The other crappy thing about Bed Rest, is that it takes about 2 or 3 days before it's better termed Bed-RestLESSNESS. Your back hurts in places you didn't know existed from uncomfortable, pillow elevating postures and sleeping positions. ie. Bran. currently has to sleep sitting up. Your eyes hurt (a consequence of too much tv/dvd's, books, and the sensitive effects of anesthesia finally wearing off). and Your social life takes the largest hit. Activity is limited and for guys like B & myself, becoming a spectator sucks.

sympathizing with Brandon, who's 18th Birthday is a week away. Poor kid. I'd make him some good soup, but it'd probably just piss him off...

Lost Now FOUND!

This day, honestly could not have been any better!!!!

I'm reading one of the greatest books I've ever read, my dinner party was absolutely wonderful, and MY GLASSES HAVE BEEN FOUND!!!!!!!!!!!!! Granted, they're 160 miles away in Minneapolis, but at least their location is known.

And Gracie loves me..........and we're watching movies tonight. Just the two of us.


such a good day. such a good good day....how fortunate.

In Father's Footsteps

My glasses are still lost, but I've found something much more important. Something of higher value than some chic designer frames...

The other day I finally started a new book. It is a book that I was skeptical of...and just couldn't seem to lift the cover on for a few months now. "Why" this has been, I'm not completely certain...a variety of personal reasons I guess.

At any rate, it's my Father's first published book called "Life at the Crossroads: Reflections from a Country Store." I'd leave a synopsis and brief summary of the content, but to do so I think would cheapen a reader's first time experience...and I think it'd cheapen the words my father has chosen within. In short though, it's his memories and stories from his childhood, and the lessons he's learned from the humble farm and country store he grew up on. I feel so proud of him. And I'm impressed. Not only with the result but with the path he's walked to get where he is now. And I've had the vantage point to see him, hear him, observe him....under go some challenging life changes from the time he started to the time it hit the press back in October. I'm halfway through it, and I feel like I'm learning things about my Father that I've always known, but have never known. And that's a rewarding and incredible feeling that I wish I could more accurately describe.

The ways he presents his ideas...his vocabulary and word choices...even his punctuation, reminds me of HIM. My dad. It's him---and the stories are him...some of them I've heard so many times, even I could recite them ---> and I've enjoyed predicting "what he'll include" and "what chapter[of his life] comes next."

I'm laughing at myself, because I've never been so eager to blog as I am right now!

The book is the essence of my father: sometimes funny, sometimes poignant, contemplative, humble......and full of love.
Someday, if I ever have a family, I hope I'm like my dad and his first book.

LOST and LONG GONE

I am annoyed. Arguably angry, and antagonized. That's right, antagonized. By my own stupid carelessness....

I lost my glasses. And this wasn't just any pair of glasses..... I went ahead and spent a ridiculous $230 on them. All on the simple notion that a) "I wanted new, darker, thicker frames" and b) I was "due" for a new pair of glasses.


In truth, they can only be so many places, and I probably haven't looked nearly hard enough or thought nearly long enough on "where else" they may be. But my frustration is presently too great for me to overcome and reach a point of mental clarity and rationale.

I've got a dinner menu to plan. Letters to write. And books to be read....and a checklist to check off. So dumb. So dumb. So long gone....shit.

Free Friday

I was given a Friday night off. It was glorious.

I spent it reading books, recipes, browsing magazines and reconnecting with some old scores I'd written long ago....which made me think about my time conducting and marching in highschool. Watching Corps and competitions...studying field shows and transitional material.

Take the next 2:38 of your life and watch this.

Best Adjectives:

Focused.
Zoned-IN
Siiiiiiick (in a spectacular kind of way)

and my personal favorite---the one which I resort to in my most-utter-moments-of-dire-disbelief: cha?!?!shit..me..
Blue Coats Knock OUT



Okay you know you want some more:
Blue Coats Closer Night
Blue Coast Closer Afternoon

Oldies Radio Rant

KVIK 104.7- FM K-Viking-Gold is a local radio station here in Decorah. I do not like their station. Nor their DJ's. Nor their radio shows. Nor their advertisements. Nor much of their music. It's just BAD FREAKIN' RADIO.

Their genre of music is Classic Hits...."oldies." I'm a Generation X child of the late '80s, and while my parents both grew up during the '60s and '70s (and '80s) raising me on everything from the Beach Boys, Elton John, Pat Benetar (yes I said it) Dire Straits, Kansas, Led Zepplin, The Beatles, Eric Clapton, Rod Stewart, etc.... I don't really connect with this music.

Frustratingly, this is the radio station that plays at the store when I'm working---like right now. Having to listen to this station nearly 3-4 days a week, week after week, probably has much to do with my disdain for their station. No, I take that back. Their station sucks, and their lack of diversity is the reason why I dislike their station SO VERY MUCH. And their DJ's sound STUPID....that and they play HORRIBLE renditions of the Star Spangled Banner EVERYDAY precisely at NOON. ***I really don't care how un-Patriotic that may make me sound....really don't. I don't need to hear the Star Spangled Banner sung by a half dozen local 9 year olds in their breathy-pitchy-tone-deaf-key-modulating-voices... In fact: (and Maybe I'm going to burn in the bowels of Dante's Inferno for saying this) I've been known to turn OFF the radio when the National Anthem comes on...

It's the same playlist OVER and OVER and OVER....AND OVER! "Classic Hits." The genre doesn't seem like that constricting, that rigid....there HAVE to be MORE songs out there than what they play...

anyways. I've resorted to iTunes Radio, XM Satellite radio, and youtube playlists I've created to maintain sanity while at the store. Yes I'll listen to Journey, and toe tap to Earth Wind and Fire and Fleetwood Mac...but Small Doses.

If ever I am driven to unhealthy drinking habbits, it won't be due to the fact that I work @ a Wine and Liquor store & bartend....rather the fact that this music makes me want to open a double magnum of Cabernet and finish it as quickly as possible.

A Tuesday Unlike Others

"Continual Pleasant Surprises" would be the best way to summarize this day, January 13, 2009.

I haphazardly hit my alarm this morning, subconsciously knowing I should have gotten up but, none the less, tugged the comforter up over my head scrunched into a ball and slept on to try and finish a dream I'd been in the middle of.

Pleasant Surprise #1: (9:18 A.M.) I woke up just about an hour and a half later without a 2nd alarm, plopped back into reality as the credits and "The End" began to roll across the completion of my dream. Blinked my eyes, double checked my phone, thought, "Wow--that dream was so good, if there were a sequel I would have been late to work," and got up, made toast and jam, showered and even made it to the bank and ran a few errands before 10. Yes!

Fast Forward 3 hours.
Pleasant Surprise #2: (12:22 P.M.) I receive a call from my other boss confirming me to bar tend for a Chamber [of Commerce] Member event hosted at the restaurant this evening. Excellent. These are typically downtown business owners and they all don't mind pumping some more money into one another's respective businesses. And I was the fortunate beneficiary from this. $75 in tips + Wage. It's no lottery, but it's $75 in tips + Wage that I wouldn't have had otherwise...and for that I am pleasantly surprised. Besides. Even that amount of money can Stretch a Very Long ways in a given circumstance. 4 words---> Third World Exchange Rate.

Fast Forward 7 and a half hours.
Pleasant Surprise #3: (7:45 P.M.) I'm invited out for dinner at a different restaurant with my bosses (spreading business within the community) and we end up meeting my OTHER employers there. And we all have a great time. And then my boss picks up the bill. And I'm just wowed.

So nice. So kind. So entertained.

Also. I got new shoes in the mail today...I ordered them. And while I was a little upset they came from California instead of from a Mall/warehouse located somewhere out of the Midwest perhaps---I'm happy they're here! And Now my feet won't be cold!!!! But I'll still wear my Adidas....I've had them since 10th grade, and I really can't part with them....

Surviving Mother Nature

The recent wintery mess that has taken a serious grip upon NE IA has reminded me of how powerful, how awesome Creation is. How Literally WILD it is.

*Don't worry, I'm going somewhere with this:

Enter Discovery Channel. It's easily one of my favorite things to watch. And recently they have brought back what I think will forever be one of the most educational, entertaining, and important series ever created: Planet Earth. Someday I'll spend 3 or 4 blog entries explaining my opinions on the value behind Planet Earth, but not tonight.

I'm focusing on a different DC series: Yep. You better believe it. Man vs. Wild starring Bear Grylls. The show requires a bit of a stretch of the imagination. Put a man and a camera crew out in the rawest, wildest places on Creation with only a canteen, army knife, a bit of flint and the clothes on his back to show you the wondrous thrills of survival and the incredibly daunting obstacles an individual would face if truly "lost" in each episode's scenarios. Traversing through environments from jungles to desserts, to mountains and vast plains....all the while on foot/make shift rafts/canoes...

As a person who loves adventure, I think back to my childhood growing up involved with the Boyscouts of America program. (laugh laugh laugh--- certainly some oddities about the program but it was good father-son time etc.) It certainly fed my appetite for outdoor education, nature identification, survival techniques and community service. I'll admit I'm no Eagle Scout, but I've spent enough time in wilderness locations and grew up around some really intelligent Nature/Creation Experts, and over my life have absorbed much of what I've observed and heard them speak about.

So while the guy knows vast more about nature's mysterious wonders of the world, On my home turf (aka the Upper Midwest) I think I could take on Bear's tv challenges..

Fire. Food. Shelter. Done...maybe I'll take a hiatus for a few days and drop myself into the Northwoods of Wisconsin this summer or trek Michigan's UP.

More than likely I'll just keep watching DC's M vs. W and live vicariously. But then again: I'm all for Vacations.

Fish Frenzy: A Sushi Lover's Paradise

I like fish. Catching them. Watching them. Cleaning them. Cooking and Eating them.

I think it's the texture...I'm big into texture in my food. And a large influence on texture is temperature. Even subtle temperature differences completely change the texture of certain foods.

Segue: SUSHI.

More specifically sashimi. It's soft. cool. smoothe. And depending on the cut and/or fish--- meaty, firm, light, or chewy. I won't use the term "rubbery" with sashimi---contradictory connotation to my infatuation with this dish.

Okay. So here's a website I like to just go watch and browse..and dream of someday buying and using their products.
http://www.honolulufish.com/index.php

P.S. I've totally considered making up a false business/restaurant name and using my home address to ship to....

The Unseen

Okay, just one more post....I really can't resist:

The Great Thing: Virtually no-one is up at this time of day/night.....which means these stars and this gigantic sky, these millions of snowflakes falling silently to the ground, these hidden secrets of the world are mine, and perhaps MINE alone.

The Sad Thing: Virtually no-one is up at this time of day/night.....which means these stars and this gigantic sky, these millions of snowflakes falling silently to the ground, these hidden secrets of the world are mine, and perhaps MINE alone.Virtually no-one is up at this time of day/night....


It's a Dramatically Ironic Beauty. Someone, somewhere, some way is absorbing this too....


Reference: Hebrews 11:1....

Patience and Potential

I get the warm fuzzies when I think about this for long, deep periods of time:

I am becoming a better cook, and better person every passing day.


:o)

THAT, is a good note to end this day upon.

Gracie-isms

Tonight as I opened the front door when I got home from work, my dog was waiting at the top steps. She lifted her head and wagged her tail as I greeted her, just anticipating the scratch between the ears she knew she'd get. Gracie is approximately 10 years old (you can do the Dog year conversion if you choose...I don't really believe in that)--but her actual age is somewhat of a mystery to our entire family. No one can quite remember when we got her, let alone how old she was when we did (she's a pound puppy).

In her younger years Gracie was a playful little thing. She would scamper around the house weaving in and out of table legs and under coffee tables, pausing at the sliding glass door in the back to survey and assess the ongoings of the backyard and gardens before trotting to the front living room windows to do the same. Come the snowy months she loved going outside and leaping through the snow when it was chest high on her.

Now a days she's quite lazy, spoiled, and far less active. During the winter months she typically lays around most of the day. She has a couple preferential locations for sprawling, atop the foot of my parents' bed, and the top steps of both our front and back door. Translation: Gaurd Dog! In the right habitat (which is 95% of the time) Gracie is about as carefree as you can get. The other 5% she deems to "maintaining her territory"...pacing the fence line to her yard, and "protecting" family members when encountering other doggies or people on walks. She lives the "Good Life" getting treats from my mom as she pleases, constantly perfecting her "look at my big brown eyes mommy" look. As a result from her spoiling, she will follow my mom EVERYWHERE in the house now, ignoring commands anyone else gives her--it's almost disgusting. On sunny days she'll migrate from sunny spot to sunny spot throughout the day. She still likes walks in the spring, and especially laying around in her yard during the fall months chasing leaves and getting in 2 or 3 excellent doggy dreams in an afternoon.

Anyways. As I approached the top step her wagging intensified, as I reached down to scratch her between the ears she bolted down the steps between my legs! The mail and car keys in my right hand went flying into the air, my bag slid off my left shoulder and proceeded to crash down the half flight of stairs like a slinky hitting every single possible step---my poor lap top and new Christmas books inside--and I ended up in a heap where she had just been...my coat now covered in her hair (she sheds year round).

Gracie never even looked back to admire her wake of desctruction, envelopes and my magazine subscriptions strewn about. Nope. She was far too busy chowing down on the treat my mom had pulled from her coat pocket.

And then I realized one of my wildest fears was real. My mom brings doggy treats to work with her.

Unwinding

A long Sunday morning of slow business.... equivocates to a bored cook.

Thusly:

The remainder of the afternoon will consist of a football game on silent, a book, Minnesota Public Radio and a plop on the couch in the sunny spot....

and Slippers.

2009

It's a New Year.

I can't get over how weird it is to write '09 or 2009....

Habbits can be so hard to break. Perhaps this is why New Year's Resolutions can be such a pain in the ass to formulate. They force us to acknowledge our individual shortcomings and imperfections.

Luckily for me, I'm perfect and don't need to make any this year...
Bahaha. Perhaps I'll dissect some of my Resolutions in the next few posts...