A change in the seasons: Spring Gardening
To Papa Jack and members of the Steele family, For Grandma, mom, Sara, & all who have gathered

It is spring, and the air has an invigorating freshness to it, does it not?  There's a clean, wet smell; of the earth itself thawing post winter.  April showers that seep into roots, trees budding, grasses and lawns returning to lush greens.  The first tulips and daisies opening their petals to drink in warm sunlight.  Visual reminders of vibrant new life, growth, and change; these are things that I feel can help us all in the days ahead.  There is an energy to be drawn from the gardens we sow, (and not just in an edible food sense....  Do we not take time to fill our hearts and indulge in this aesthetic?  To reap the joy that can be found in a perfectly potted herb garden? (or in Aunt Sara's case, a hum-dinger of a beautiful butternut squash crop last fall!)  Being aware in the beauty of who and what is around us, and reveling in the present. 

And just as much to our external perceptions, I can't help but be mindful and reflect inwardly of ourselves and our relationships to one another.  There is a hole in my family garden, a file that has no traceable direct contacts to a land that Papa Jack spent time serving in the Air Force.  Slowly, I have been filling that hole with beautiful things, bridging the gap by planting fond memories and a myriad of blessings in my life.  How humbling it is for me, to remember that I am named after my grandfathers.  It is their names and it is mine.  I own it.  To be able to say that I am Jackson Lee.  How humbling it is, to have the best part of my life directly in front of me, and the opportunity to live my life with a reflection of the servitude my grandfathers exemplified in their own.

I think my mother would agree, and perhaps find a smidget of humor, in the uncanny similarities between her father and her middle (more handsome, more observant, more perfect, more comedic....more....humble) son.  Allow me to continue in a brief comparison of slight vanity, and self-righteous glorification to Papa Jack.

--Back in the day, Papa Jack was one halfway good lookin' dude!  (I mean, grandma obviously thought so)  (**He probably could have used a few fashion pointers from me, as well as my parents and aunts and uncles, but everyone in those days could have.)  Did you see those pictures of him in that slide show?!
--He had a passion for flying. (I have a bizarre euphoric enjoyment with airports and travel; a characteristic that skipped my mother, was passed onto Sara and then to my cousins, siblings, and myself.)
--He cared about his family and worked hard to provide them with not only the enjoyable materials of life (like annual trips to Hawaii and hideous sundresses for his daughters) but with a household of love both tough and gentle. (I care about my family so much that I still live at home to take care of my parents, walking the dog, doing the dishes and laundry, having the driveway shoveled before they go to work at 5:30 a.m. in the winter)
--He never turned down a glass of Chardonnay.  (I would have to say that, my preference in styles of Chardonnay are bit more........ "informed" than Papa Jack's, my mother would probably term them "Expensive" or "Pricey" but if the stacks of wine boxes in my parent's basement are any testament to his mentoring of myself, I'd have to at least attribute our common interest in grape products.

And lastly, in his more recent later years of life, Papa Jack was a pretty stubborn man; and in some regards I think it could be argued that he was stubborn his whole life.  (I would bet the farm, my mother would whole heartedly agree that I've been a stubborn man my whole life, from my literal crib and infant late night door pounding to my unyielding will in any form of a competitive environment--sports, board games, flash cards you name it.)  Stubbornness is a quality and characteristic that often carries a negative connotation in our modern usage.  Papa Jack often refused help from those around him, he wanted to be independent, to be strong and able-bodied; characteristics that he'd modeled his whole life with a deep sense of pride.  And in my self examination, I'd have to admit that I too, often refuse to ask for help even when I know I need it.  But what a perfect Easter reminder this quality of Papa Jack and myself is: ........are we not all alike in this account?  Have we not all acted this way, closing ourselves off from help, care and love?  It's part of our imperfection; part of our humanity. 

So I take pleasure in re-thinking stubbornness.  Papa Jack used to go walk at the mall, even though it hurt his knees and body to do so, and I think he stubbornly continued to do so until it hurt too much.  And I know of another stubborn man; who stubbornly refused to give into his own fears, who stubbornly embraced the challenges and changes in his life and relationships with people who pushed him away....who we were reminded last week, stubbornly carried a cross up a hill and hung upon it.  And in the unbelievable awesomeness of the Resurrection, surely stubbornness isn't such a poor quality to embody.

My hunch is that Papa Jack will get back to doing things he used to enjoy and love; spending some quality father-daughter time, perhaps breaking down and tagging along on a shopping trip to some mall in heaven with Paula, fretting over the amount of bags she exits with, and taking liberties with a 2nd or even 3rd glass of Chardonnay afterwards. 

"Go ahead and catch your flight.  Sunny skies, quick layovers, and smooth landings Papa Jack.  May you start enjoying Rombauer Chardonnay on a daily basis, and never sip on Franzia again.  If the family that's left here is any indication of your work and life, I'd say you have something to be admired for."

Your Loving Grandson,
Jackson