Cooking Competitions

I'll admit it. I watch a fair amount of Food Network and HGTV...Discovery Channel...Travel Channel... for some really lame reason I refer to this conglomeration of shows as The DC ("Domesticated Circuit").

Okay rephrase: The DC is often on TV at my house...i may not be full-heartedly watching it, but it's on....

I like to watch the cooking competitions that have become a huge fad, Top Chef, Next Food Network Star, Iron Chef (and I even cringe my way through an hour of Iron Chef America every now and then...) Ultimate Challenge, and most recently Chopped! *Don't worry, I'm still waiting for the 3rd season of Army Wives on Lifetime to air later this summer/fall.

I think I could win one of those competitions. [*In due time, I fully intend on submitting a tape/application for Top Chef...if it's still on the air in 10 years] The Celebrity Chefs that are sweeping the hearts and minds of Americans via Food Network (Emeril, Mario Batali, Bobby Flay....etc.) are who they are not simply because of their culinary abilities, but largely in part for their personalities and marketing potential. That and they have a lot of $$$.

Anyways. I've contemplated entering recipes of my own, and I have these illusions and dreams of a huge TV breakthrough by winning something. And they're nice thoughts, but I generally dismiss them, mostly l tell myself these silly things out of my personal disapproval with a contestant's tragic choices....or because I can't stand Alton Brown. And that I think Guy Fieri is a sad excuse for a cooking show host.

*I fully acknowledge the ease with which I can sit back and type ferociously, all the while verbally bashing these Culinary figures and their careers....and ignoring how little I actually know in comparison to them.

Did I mention I hate Raechel Ray?? Because I do. A lot.


So what started as a nice post about competitive aspirations has become a bloody rant against Food Networks overly praised, overly payed icons. Best post I've put together in awhile! if I do say so myself.